


Blue wish window seas

by unexpectedfeel



Category: TWICE (Band)
Genre: F/F, friendship also matters, mina is a fool for love, soft, the typical confession story
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-18
Updated: 2020-08-18
Packaged: 2021-03-06 05:34:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,225
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25978309
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/unexpectedfeel/pseuds/unexpectedfeel
Summary: Mina was ready to confess to Nayeon. It's a process inside of which she grew up.
Relationships: Im Nayeon/Myoui Mina
Comments: 7
Kudos: 73
Collections: Shot Thru the Heart: A Writing Collection





	Blue wish window seas

**Mina’s POV.**

I decided to confess.

My heart has been full of love since months now and it was starting to spill its colors out. It became impossible for me to hide my feelings towards Nayeon.

We met two years ago when she got transferred to our school, in Kobe. She had a strong Korean accent, it made all the boys and girls head spin. The students and teachers were head over heels for the new transferee and to be honest I was no exception.

At first, it was silly crush. Her beauty was striking, it had an immediate effect inside my chest, Cupid had shot his arrow right through my heart but I believed it was superficial. Each time she smiled, my heart squeezed tightly inside my chest. I was under her spell, keeping it a secret and trying to deny that yes; I was attracted to Im Nayeon.

We did share some classes’ together, English, Japanese literature and French. Since we shared the same interests and that I was pretty good at school, I believe she found in me the best person to befriend. Quick enough, I became the person she trusted the most at the Campus. Such a blessing for my shy persona.

Cafeteria was the perfect place to meet in between classes, we’d work together in silence and take small breaks to laugh and share little secrets. Sometimes friends or other students would come and we’d work a bit together, but we always were the last ones leaving the nice and spacious cafeteria.

Everything was easy with her. Nayeon’s eyes sparkled whenever I opened my mouth to share any subject with passion. She’d listen carefully, ask questions and make me feel like I was the most interesting soul on earth. Let it be about video games, history or food, her smile encouraged me to continue. Nobody else could make me feel worth it. Nobody else.

When you meet someone that makes you want to break your own shell and open up, you don’t want that person to become someone else’s center of attention. Slowly, through the season’s, I’ve been nurturing this fear of losing the special bond we shared.

That was how I’ve discovered that I fell in love with Nayeon.

Making her smile became a need, I wanted to believe that I was capable of lifting up her mood and that I was good enough to make her feel alright here in Japan, far from home. It was important to make her feel loved, as a friend.

Because for now, we were friends and there was one last step before releasing what I believed would be the real start of a new world. A world inside of which we’d be able to hold hands and let our hearts speak their real feelings, if she had any for me.

Those amazing feelings were still locked, hammering at the door to burst out in the open. I knew it would feel astounding. I could imagine fireworks inside my stomach each time I dreamt of us being more than just friends.

Once a month, we took the habit to go drink in town, often buying new cute pens and school furniture. Nayeon adored shopping and of course, I did too. Sharing this little activity made me extremely happy. Sometimes, we would drop our routine to visit a museum or leave Kobe to visit new places, to breathe outside the anthill. Our memories are deeply engraved inside my memory.

Last spring we went in Nishinomiya in Hyōgo’s prefecture. It was shortly before I stopped denying my feelings for her.

**Nishinomiya – memories.**

Both fairly interested by history, we were eager to visit Nishinomiya’s shrine. Besides living in Japan, it was unusual for me to leave Kobe. Nayeon came in my life, shook me like a tree until the apples fell and we started to bite onto life together. She was good to motivate me and it made it easier to move my lazy ass out of my room. I started to live, in the real world, looking up at the sky and not down at the ground. Taking action instead of dreaming fulfilled me with happiness.

We planned our Saturday together and met early at the train station of Tokaido-Sanyo Line. It was a thirty minutes travel but enough to make us excited to leave behind us the tall building’s from Kobe. The sun was at the rendez-vous, we both chose to wear white skirts that day with white shoes. The only difference was her navy blue t-shirt while mine was purple, I had my blonde hair tied up in a ponytail while Nayeon never ever mistreated her long black silky hair by any types of elastics.

We left the train to find Ebassan-suji road, walking in between the green and tall tree’s saving us from a burning sun. Sometimes, a small breeze would make the leafs tremble, as if Spring wanted to remind us that summer only started a few days ago.

“You are the only person I like travelling with. Always curious, always greedy to know more, waiting to be amazed.” We were walking under the Torii gate, a column of lanterns on our side, almost hiding a low shrine right behind their structure. Nayeon’s voice ushered me out of my dreamy thoughts.

“I can’t live a life without an open heart and open mind. Beauty is everywhere and I refuse to miss easy education.” It was bit too formal to answer a praise but I was blushing, acting cool. Nayeon caught the smile on my lips and her bunny teeth did greet me back. We reached the house of Ebisu, the God of Wealth. The red and green colors were striking. We both snapped pics, ready to run out of battery by the end of the day.

To be honest, we didn’t need any prayers to save ourselves from poverty. My own family had a good financial situation, thanks to my father for working hard and being a great surgeon. Nayeon never lacked of anything either. But what was the point if we didn’t immersed into the general shrine’s vibe ? We were eager to ask for a blessing. It wouldn’t hurt a fly to try and perpetuate our traditions.

It soon became a bit hard to keep focusing on the details about the shrine. Our main goal after almost one hour strolling around was to take the greatest picture of each other.

I made a little story on Instagram that day.

Nayeon published picture of us together on her profile, leaving hearts and rainbows in the comments.

It was innocent pictures that lead to a particular situation. We both got back home, but on our way back while we were sitting inside the train, Nayeon started to get flooded with comments on her Instagram. She had around 800 followers but quickly won over 200, tons of likes given to the recent pics she did post while we left Nishinomiya. Eyebrow raised, I checked over her shoulder to understand what was going on. Nayeon seemed a bit taken aback.

“What’s wrong ?” I was curious. Her finger kept scrolling down the comments and my heart froze.

**You both make a cute couple. _2 likes_**

**Look! Two cute lesbians! @lovelystars _1 like_**

**Girls you are so cute together! I will follow your insta hoping you’ll post more T_T _5 likes_**

There was a short silence between both of us. My heart was racing, I secretly hoped she couldn’t sense I was in panic. We weren’t dating. We weren’t in love. It escalated quickly, too quickly for both of us to proceed.

“It’s a funny misunderstanding…” Nayeon broke the silence and locked her phone screen. There was a small smile on her lips. Maybe I was making up things but for a second, I felt like she was fighting a bigger smile, the kind of smiles you’re afraid to display. A smile that hides secrets.

I breathed, noticing that I won followers too. She tagged me, it was the snowball effect.

“Aren’t you afraid ?” My voice was so low, I was scared to win a painful reaction.

“Afraid of ?” The answer was quick, it made me blink several times and our eyes met. Her smile made my heart stop for a second and I cracked a nervous laugh.

“People thinking that we are together.”

It felt like my voice rang through the whole wagon. Being extremely shy, I felt like eyes were on us, waiting for an answer that wouldn’t go against the popular beliefs. Maybe I wanted her to say _yes it bothers me_. Maybe I needed a good slap on my cheek to remind me that my chances were close from zero.

My chances ?

It hit me so hard. I almost couldn’t hear Nayeon’s words. She was laughing, hugging my shoulders while I was processing my self-confession. This couldn’t be, I couldn’t imply to myself that I could possibly imagine us having a romantic relationship.

“I think we’d make a beautiful couple, of course I’m not afraid! I don’t care. I was just surprised.”

She was _just_ surprised.

And I was _just_ falling for her.  
  


**END Nishinomiya – memories.**

The bell rang.

It was one of the last days before we both chose to part ways. It wasn’t that terrible, I wanted to become an English teacher and Nayeon wanted to pursue a little bit further to become an official translator at the parliament. She wanted to move in Tokyo and I wanted to stay in Kobe.

She convinced me to follow her to the capital, to jump in the unknown.

I was gathering my books to put them inside my bag. I was feeling a little bit nervous. It was unusual for us to finish after 7 but exams were on the corner and we both wanted to take extra classes to ace English. Nayeon had a perfect accent, she worked so hard and found an American friend to talk with through the phone twice a week.

I personally chose to improve with my father.

We soon reached the gates to breathe the fresh air. Momo ran past us, giving us a quick goodbye. She probably went to meet with other friends to party. It was Friday night, Momo loved dancing which was also one of my secret hobbies but not in public.

“There is something so mysterious about Momo. Can’t you feel it ?” Nayeon stopped walking while Momo’s silhouette was fading under the orange sunlight. There was a small breeze and a few steps behind I was looking at her dark locks.

“What do you mean ?” I closed the gap between us. She took my hand. It wasn’t unusual to hold hands here in Japan but each time she did, there was electricity in the tip of my fingers. I wanted to hold her hand forever, to make her spin and laugh.

“She has a bright smile but when she’s alone, it feels like she is incomplete.” At the moment those words rolled down her red lips, her scent made me reminisce about Mount Rokko. It was a little trip with Momo, three months ago at spring’s peak.

“Does it make you sad ?” But she shook her head. Momo was our friend but she was strong. There was something inside her bones that made her unbreakable. Despite her bad smoking habit, she had good grades and was loved. This missing piece, she’d find it.

But I couldn't speak for her.

“Not really, because I know how it feels and I also know you can overcome it.” I hummed in silence, smelling the flowery perfume exuding from her neck.

It was my gift and Momo was there, that day.

**Mount Rokko – memories.**

Momo has been an acquaintance for years. We didn’t share any class together but for some reasons we always smiled at each other through the hallways or at the campus. There was times we’d sit next to each other while eating, will it be at the cafeteria or outside – before we both met Nayeon. It was spontaneous, a relationship without any appointment. But our relationship never went further from one or two meals together a month, we both felt satisfied with such a friendship that didn’t ask for too much effort.

I liked her a lot.

She was considerate and had a particular sense of humor. It was easy for her to make me laugh with a single word. Sometimes she’d make weird circles with her hands but I would always understand the meaning behind her uncommon mind.

We both had very different life styles but I caught a special interest about Momo when I started noticing the dark spots. There was more than just kindness. Her laugh was genuine but sometimes, she would look at the sky with empty eyes. If I could crack her skull open and lean above her mind, able to listen to her thoughts. Just like Nayeon figured out, there was a faint light – almost invisible for the eye, inside Momo’s dark orbs. It flickered so weakly. We both couldn’t let it die.

Needless to say, Nayeon and I took this opportunity to grab Momo’s arm to go visit Mount Rokko.

Kobe and Osaka could be seen from that spot. There’s enough activities for us to enjoy a little outing without getting bored. We went to Sannomiya station to take the Hankyu Kobe line to Rokko’s station. The rides were short, we could barely exchange a word in between the travels. We took the bus 16 to reach Rokko’s cable car.

Momo wasn’t feeling it.

We took tickets and it was soon our turn to take the cable car. Momo turned pale. I felt like she was about to throw up anytime but her clenched jaw probably helped her not to. She took out a cigarette from her pocket and barely had time to smoke anything before it was our turn to get inside.

“I am going to fucking die.” The ride didn’t last more than 10 minutes. Momo’s nails dug onto my skin while Nayeon kept taking selfies, including us too. Maybe it wasn’t the perfect time to crack a mocking smile, but Momo looked like a dead person on each picture. It was too hard not to smirk at each shots. It was a whole sketch it felt like the ride lasted for hours. “Never post those pics on SNS or I sue you Nayeon!” I will always remember.

Once up there. Momo went for another cigarette, gripping the metallic barrier to make sure she still was on planet earth and didn’t leave her soul somewhere inside the cabin. Nayeon and I waited until Momo’s skin returned to its original color. The day could finally start.

“Why do you smoke?” It was a little bit indiscreet but our international Peach girl shrugged it off. Unbothered.

“I took this habit in Kyoto when I was sixteen. My friends used to smoke a lot there. I stopped for a while but I guess once we start…” She tossed a chewing gum inside her mouth, chewing loudly in an attempt to get rid of the cigarette’s bad taste. Nayeon didn’t really listen since we was reading the map of Mount Rokko.

There was a botanical garden, a music box museum, a pasture with flowers and sheep, a terrace, shops and the main attraction; the observation deck.

We first tried to visit the music box museum but it wasn’t what we’ve been expecting. Of course there was enough to see but learning about ancient melodies through harpsichord wasn’t our jam. We already had to tolerate the boring aspects of it at school when we were younger, what happened in the past, must stay in the past.

Together we enjoyed a nice walk around the sheep pasture. There wasn’t so many people, it was easy to rip grass off the group to attract the animals towards us. It barely worked, only one or two babies came running to ignore us a second after. Momo wined. In the meantime, while our friend was squatting down, I felt Nayeon’s hand touching mine. It made my heart race. We were used to intertwine our fingers but behind Momo’s back it felt like we were hiding a secret.

I breathed, debating if I should or not give into my desire to hold Nayeon’s delicate hand. My little finger touched her skin. I felt a small movement, a brush past my palm but Momo looked up at us. We pulled apart. Nothing happened.

“Guys, you can go for a walk. I can’t move from here, those sheep are calling for me.” For a moment, the Momo we knew; always serious around the others in campus to hide her little preferences for cute furniture and animals - was gone. Her eyes were pleading us. Of course she could stay, who in the world could say no to her ?

Nayeon and I told her we’d probably meet in front of the shop or at the observation deck if we both still were looking at the landscape. That’s how we left Momo to take a little walk around the area, taking our time to talk about summer and rain, school and friends. Her shoulders kept brushing against mine. There was a very small space between our hands and I was dying to hold hers. We could run away, somewhere and for days people wouldn’t know where we’d hide. Just Nayeon and I.

“I can’t believe it has been two years already. It’s coming to an end and we’ll say goodbye to Kobe.” She was right, in a few weeks we’d take our luggage’s and move to Tokyo. It made me nervous to leave my hometown. To leave my family behind and my habits. There was something frightening about being pushed inside Tokyo, the big city. I was leaving home to follow my dreams but also Nayeon, without this incredible woman by my side, maybe I would have stayed here forever.

“Aren’t you eager to finally live in the Capital ? It was your main objective after all.” We’ve reached the deck. It felt like looking at Osaka and Kobe for the last time. Air got stuck inside my chest. I shuddered. A strong feeling of nostalgia embraced my whole being and there, I instinctively took Nayeon’s hand inside of mine. She didn’t flinch. She was waiting for my touch, our fingers intertwining together.

Our eyes on the city we felt like giants. We could lift our feet and crush the buildings just like Godzilla. Life seemed fragile from the above.

I wanted to tell her, _I want to be with you_.

“It is my dream, but my life here in Japan started in Kobe. It feels weird to leave.” Her thumb was stroking my skin it was soft. I felt included into her memories, I was included. Maybe if she took me with her it was to take some parts of Kobe inside her pocket. I’d be her Mina, reminding her about how it all started. A funny thought that I wish wasn’t true. I wanted to be more than that.

“It is my home. I’ve never left.” We stopped in front of the stone wall. I was waiting for Nayeon to stand by my side but instead, I felt warm hands on my hips, pushing me towards her body. It almost made me gasp for air.  
  
“Do you really want to go ?” She breathed, chin now resting against my shoulder. Her arms slowly sneaked around my waist to give me gentle hug. I could melt.

“I don’t want to stay if you go.” There was confidence in my words. Yes, she must know I wanted to follow her if she wanted me by her side.

“You will always be able to come back. You are not leaving for good, there is also holidays… we could, maybe come back together.” Her voice was deep. As if, without me knowing, she already scheduled the future with me involved inside her personal plans. I stumbled on my words.

“Hey, you- you have your life. You don’t need to come with me, I mean I have my family and brother.” But she didn’t argue. Seconds felt like hours but when I felt more relaxed, I leaned on her thin body. She was holding me. I believe people around would be confused, some would whisper about us. But what if they thought we were a couple ? I _wanted_ them to believe it.

I wish every day we could lean on each other, break the boundaries little by little.

What if we looked into each other’s eyes now and would know that; nobody else could make us reach this amount of bliss when we are together ? What if we were going through the same introspection about life and who we want to be with ?

Time didn’t exist in the ocean of my thoughts. I was scared that it would be the last time she’d hold me close and make me feel like I mean the world to her. I was scared that someday, someone would win her heart and that everything we’ve build would collapse like a house of cards. My heart started pounding again.

“You smell like flowers but it is so frail, my breath can chase it away.” Her breath tickled me, just a little. I closed my eyes.

“You don’t smell like flowers.” My words made her laugh. She moved back a bit but she still had one hand holding my hip.

“So what’s my natural scent ?” She spun me around, our hands found each other after a swift movement and we laughed. Some heads turned towards our direction but none really cared. Nobody else cared but Nayeon and I.

“Cherry, it depends on what bubblegum you bought.” I paused, index against my own chin. “Yes! Cherry or Cinnamon.” Hand in hand we started walking along the wall. It was high enough to protect us from the void but a single push could make us hurtle us down the ravine. I looked down but Nayeon’s voice brought me back to the real talk.

“But that’s my mouth scent.” She had a knowing smile. My eyes were looking at her full lips. I wanted to know if they really tasted like Cherry. If anybody else knew it. “I do not smell like anything ?” Her eyes couldn’t hide the slight disappointment. I shook my head but an idea came up. I opened my mouth, ready to speak when Momo caught our attention. She was stepping down the large parcels of stone, hands inside her pockets.

“Are you two hiding something from me ?” There was a glow inside her eyes and a smirk on the corner of her lips. I was a deer caught in the lights of a truck coming at me with full speed, unsure if I’d survive.

“Hiding what ?” I blurted out, letting go of Nayeon’s hand, missing the disappointment inside her eyes. This was now a silent discussion. Momo walked past us, eyes on the view. I had to read between the lines, to prepare myself. I wasn’t ready for Nayeon’s words, I didn’t want to hear _we are just friends_ coming out of her mouth. Even if it was the truth. Momo stuck a cigarette in between her lips but didn’t light it up.

“Nothing, I was just messing with you two.” It was mumbled in between her teeth. She was facing Kobe and Osaka, already lost in thoughts. Again, the wave of sadness she always carried with her took me in. Momo bended a bit, looking further at the sea. The city didn’t possess what she needed. “You have something…” She started. I was hanging on her lips. I came closer, drowned by anything she could spill. Wanting to hear it. For our birth or destruction, of Nayeon and I. Of us. This was suspended on her lips.

“I don’t know what’s inside your mind but if you need to talk.” I tried, my hand almost touching her back to make her feel that she wasn’t alone, to comfort her but I couldn’t. I was afraid to be overwhelmed by a sadness that wasn’t mine.

“I never had someone that would look at me, the same way you both look at each other.” Her words got caught in the fishnet of my thoughts. Stuck in between an intense jubilation and an intense sadness.

“Mount Rokko is making you emotional ?” Nayeon broke the heavy atmosphere with a radiant smile. She was next to Momo, both of us creating an invisible shield around our friend.

“Let someone appreciate you for who you are, stay open, learn that you can be loved and that you can love yourself. And one day, you’ll stop clenching your fist to fight but you will open it and someone… Someone would grab your hand.” While talking, Nayeon’s hand was stroking Momo’s shoulder and somehow, I felt like she was talking about us. It struck me because, it wasn’t words she did throw at our friend to make her smile. It was possible to look up and feel happy.

I smiled.

I was happy.

“You are our friend.” Despite my usual introverted self, my arm wrapped around Momo’s shoulders and her smile brightened. I could give her my support, my conviction that yes she deserved to breathe. She wasn’t stuck in a place forever. She had to open her heart and hand once she’d be ready to. Friends would help.

Momo could do it too. She didn’t need to hide her emotions and suffer in silence and I knew, that that day she made a huge step by opening up a bit. She did let us see a crack and we filled the crack with love and support. Life was a fight, but it’s also about love.

Before taking the cable car – definitely a terrible battle for our Miss Hirai, we took time to visit the shop. There was some stuff that did pick my interest but I couldn’t get rid of one thought; Nayeon’s scent. Together we bought food boxes, Yamamistu pies, Milk balms, we took straps with Mount Rokko’s cable car designed on it. I took it in blue, Nayeon in purple and Momo in pink.

I kept it for me until the end, until we’ve reached the bus 16 and had to go separate ways at Sannomiya station. Momo bid us good bye while I asked Nayeon if I could walk her back home, as usual. It wasn’t a long walk but enough for me to gather courage and pull out of my back a little gift.

A perfume.

“For you to remember the day. For you to remember Kobe.” My voice gradually faded while she stopped midway to unwrap the small perfume that could last for a year if she did use it wisely. She sprayed some on her wrists to smell and I knew; she loved it.

“Rose ?” She guessed and yes, indeed it was the scent of Roses.

“It suits you. You don’t have to wear it but, I thought you’d like.” She put it inside her bag before taking my hand without any awkward pause. It was us.  
  
“I like it.” That’s all she said, sun setting behind our backs, warming up our nape and back. There was a slight smile on my lips, red on my cheeks. If I was courageous enough I would let poetry flow from my lips, I’d tell her about the world and picture her as the most incredible person I’ve ever met. The person and soul I wanted to travel with, wake up with.

“Nayeon.” Our eyes met. I was once again struck by her beauty, self-conscious that she was giving so much to me. My voice took its sweet time to reach my lips and courage almost ran out of my lungs to abandon me. But it didn’t.

“I love myself now.”

**END Mount Rokko – memories.**

**Nayeon’s POV.**

Mina has been looking at me the whole day. For sure, today something was about to happen, I was aware of it. She’s never been good at hiding her intentions nor her thoughts. From the day we met, until now, I always knew when she needed to talk.

We were walking towards my place. I slowed down, knowing she would stop me at some point. I could feel it in my guts. 

Together we’ve seen enough, we’ve felt the sparkles and had silent conversations through touches and stares. The world already knew something, the black birds didn’t fly away yet, waiting for Mina to do it.

She caught my wrist before we’ve reached my place. I saw in her eyes what I was waiting for : secrets. Her whole being was bending, giving into her need to speak. Up until now, I’ve seen her become courageous and no, I did nothing. Alone, Mina opened up to me because we did have a good feeling going on between us.

Her last words in Mount Rokko made my heart race. _I love myself now_.

“I want to tell you something but, can we sit somewhere ?” Her voice was soft. I smiled, ready to feel the waves wash away my own fears. Because many people saw me as a solid pillar but I was a human with fears just like anybody else. Mina knew when to comfort me, when to make me smile. Her knowledge helped me to discover more about the world, I wanted to be a translator with enough knowledge about the world but without her I wouldn’t know half of what I know now.

“Yes, of course we can.” We tried to find a park. It was the best option to gain enough intimacy. Without a word, I followed her. I wasn’t nervous at all, I was mostly full of apprehension.

Through the months, the small years we’ve got to know each other, we both flirted with the lines. I’ve dropped hints too.  
  
I wanted Mina.

“You really don’t have to react but there is something I’ve been thinking about for a while.” We didn’t sit. I felt like it would be useless, Mina had to tell me now before she exploded. I reached for her hand.

“It’s fine Mina.” My voice wavered. It took her aback. “Just say it. I’ve been a coward to tell you myself.” I couldn’t lie anymore either. Mina breathed, she was paralyzed for a moment. I squeezed her hand. Both lost in words, she was the first to step forward and soon, eyes closed, I felt her moving. She smelled like flowers.

Her lips tasted like watermelon.

We couldn’t stop. Our lips melted perfectly against one another, her hands on my shoulders made me shiver and it was on the tip of my tongue. I wanted to tell her. She wanted to tell me. She smiled through the kiss when my boldness took advantage, my tongue going through a delicious crusade to meet hers for an armistice.

It wasn’t enough.

When I opened my eyes, I met with her brown orbs, the tip of her fingers stroking my cheeks.

“I am not scared to be with you.” My words touched her heart. Her thumb brushed past my lips, tears almost falling down her eyes. I would catch them, swim into our own ocean and we’d never drown.

“We are together.”

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote it by hand at work, everyday. I was lacking of time, maybe one day I will rewrite it! But for now, I hope you enjoyed the story!


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